Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Easterdam and Paree Le Fou

Sorry about the scant blogging, but my torpidity has dealt a furious blow to my beloved Mac in the form of a gnarly, broke-ass screen. Mercifully my travel companion, the Indiana-born, self proclaimed "Picky Eater" , Mr. Kenneth Christie, is toting around his inferior, but nonetheless useful DELL. So I had a few realizations about Amsterdam.Primarily the Netherlands are referred to as such because they are nether..far..far from anything interesting. In lieu of actual culture or lively intellectual movements, the Dutch have opted for Drug Use and whoring, which of course,made it our first stop.

Easter in Dutch is called Paas. Yes, like the egg decorating kits. They are owned by a Dutch company. If you color Eggs with PAAS, you are supporting prostitution anddrug-use.
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Oh, look! A quaint Dutch Brothel. Lovely weather for Easter Whoring, huh guys?
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In case you had any questions about how sex obsessed Amsterdam is...
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Then its off to Paris, with the madman who changed the Lulus menu to read "Freedom Fries". I was determined to show Kenny a good time in Paris. But first, some culture.

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Notre Dame. No, there is no football here. No that's not a cheerleader.

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No Kenny, you're not supposed to take a picture of.. Kenny ..Kenny?

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As a matter of fact, I DO know what "Voulez vous coucher avec mois" means.

At the moment, we are in London, and tomorrow is the super speedy all access deeply emotional and thorough one-day London Tour, as given by anglophile extraoridnaire and owner of the 5 CD set of Simon Schama's "A History of Britain"- Me.


Nate Combs said...

Come on Alf... there's plenty of culture in Amsterdam. What about the Van Gogh museum (over 300 original Van Goghs, including 28 self portraits!) or the Rijksmuseum? Seeing "The Night Watch" alone is worth the price of admission. And then there's the Annex of Anne Frank... quite small, in real life. What about the cathedral of St. Nicholas, patron saint to sailors and kids in need of gifts? As a side note, did you know that St. Nick's tomb is in Turkey? He supposedly ascended from it, thus the sainthood, but it's there. Amsterdam has more canals than Venice does, but does anybody ever mention them? Of course not. It's always about whorin' and tokin'.

nate combs said...

PS: You gotta love the one-day speed-tours. I once gave my wife a "Rome in 24 hours" tour that involved me comically giving her a verbal walk-through of the Forum while we stood outside its locked gates and tried to peer into the dark.

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