Friday, April 29, 2005

Dramatis Personae

I have recently gotten into some verbal slinging with actors, and I’ve decided to post to the ether or blogosphere, whichever you prefer according to your technical savvy and nerdability, the ruminations that led to near fisticuffs, and much wailing from several dramatis personae.

I maintain that an actor is not an artist, but rather a tool through which an artist expresses him or herself. A Director, a playwright, a set designer, are all artists. An actor is a craftsman. Like the carpenter who pulls together a set, an actor portrays the ideas of the playwright and embodies it as such through use of their emotional toolbox, and physical and mental abilities.

Oooh a nasty thing to say, that I’m sure caused many actors to take pause before blustering forth, demanding recognition of their efforts as art. I do not argue that it is a difficult thing to be an actor. Moreso a trained actor. I spent my collegian life studying the various forms of theater and have endured everything from the psychotic version of Stanislavsky that Lee Strasberg defined as the “method”, to the facist rendering of Meisner Technique that David Mamet and his Steppenwolf/Atlantic cronies practice. I am familiar with styles, methods, history, acting, screen, stage, production, directing, musical, drama, comedy, and I defer to Orson Welles who said of the Academy Awards, “ Academy of Motion Pictures Arts and Sciences? What Art? What Science?”. I am hardly Orson Welles, and truthfully only Citizen Kane himself could be so wholly dismissive of the beauty and art of cinema. There is art in cinema. A film in its entirety can be a transcending, artistic experience but much like painting, it a series of elements put on a canvas.

An actor, at the end of the day can offer no more, regardless of training and experience, than himself. His reactions in real life, will be equivalent to his reactions on stage or screen. The notion of a transformation is a false one. The most effective actors are those whose personalities are so complex, that we cease to care about who they are on stage or off, it’s a joy to simply watch them being them. Take the three following actors as my examples: Al Pacino, Jack Nicholson, and Daniel Day Lewis. Three of the most intense and amazing actors I could muster. I challenge anyone reading to name me four characters each of them has played. Name Al Pacino’s character’s name in The Devil’s Advocate. Better yet, Jack Nicholson’s Name in ANYTHING other than Batman. Daniel Day Lewis is a man who take great effort to transform himself into whatever character he is playing, and even then I say that only Daniel Day Lewis is complex enough a Human being to give these characters life. Daniel Day Lewis decided to quit acting years ago, moved to Venice and became a woodcarver or some such manic thing. I say that there is something unstill about him, a quest for some peace that explodes onto the screen, but is also omnipresent in his personal life.

We all believe that our emotions and our feelings are not only valid, but far more sharp than those of the people around us. You look at the lives of quiet desperation around you and wonder “Do people feel as much as I do?” . To desire to be an actor, you must also posses the egomaniacal notion that your emotions, your life, your experiences are interesting enough to be watched. In a few instances they are. People themselves become or are so complex, apply training and discipline to the point where they merit watching and accolades. But what about the uninteresting? The mediocre? Surely they also become actors.

The Mediocre actor, is a person who has not engaged fully in life, and is therefore limited by their own experiences, or lack thereof. Simply put. Real people can be real boring. There are Outlandish humans out there who make for beautiful moments, but you surely can’t call the random experiences of living “Art” if someone who lives well, and feels deeply is considered an artist, then surely there are deeply emotional fishermen who deserve the term “Artist”. So the ego to put it forth is the only deciding factor as to what’s Art and what’s simply living? Highly unfair, and unwarranted. Actors should be happy enough knowing that they have honed a craft and posses a skill, without needing to elevate what we all experience daily to the title of “Art”. Let’s keep that beauteous elevation far from the reaches of the mundane. Let us keep Art sacred and away from the hands of actors.


Take a walk on the wild side

Have I ever told you about my friend Serena?
Actually I KNOW I have. Through Gnarling and gnashing of teeth, through screaming, and kicking, she's still the coolest chick I know.
Listen to this, and tell me she isn't..

Thursday, April 28, 2005


Is today a great day on the web or what? I haven't been surfing this well since I was employed.



OOPS! I Did it again.

Royal Pizza

Pizza Express in the UK will deliver these to you for an added sum.
Not the coolest thing I've ever seen, still it beats the Dominos Cheeseburger Pizza

Post Secret

I Love this reminds of that sad little Mea Culpa Entry I did about 6 entries down.ticket

Making room for the coolest Kids

Goddamit! Now I have to Blog three or four new things simply to get those little nerds to fit on my page!

Enjoy this beauty from W Bush

Tribute to the coolest Kids of the 80's and today

I've never been any good at video games, but surely ANYONE can appreciate their achievements.
1982 All Stars
And if you think kids back then were weird, and kids today are far more normal, then I urge you to check out the young lady pictured HERE at her quincenera (Or however you spell Fifteenth Birthday in Portugese). Those eyes! They BURN!

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Cause Celebre'

No Offense to Trent, but the only thing worse than an actual celebrity, is THIS

How much must your life suck, if that's all you got going?
Whatever Happened to real culture?

Friday, April 22, 2005

Do you ever wish you could go Back in time?


Keeping With the Dynamite theme, here's a link for all of you who miss 82'

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Hercules the Liger

Yeah, a real live Liger (Known for it's skills in magic)
This kitty is housed in an australian zoo and has some sort of glandular problem that will allow it to keep growing for it's entire life. Freakin' sweet.
Just in case you'd never seen a Liger.

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Now What?

WinoOk, so what can i afford to do, now that I've been sacked?
Oh Wait! What's the date?Alcobong
What DO they say about necessity?
It's the mother of jobless alcoholic drug addicts?

Monday, April 18, 2005

For all your Papal Needs

So the Apostolic seat remains empty at the moment, and you wonder,
"Where do I go for tasteful insight, regarding the Petran Post?"

Holy Seejulius2ICUJP2

Look no further than the tasteful and Catholic Approved Pope Blog

A Rough Start

My Freaky Morning has included conversations with these chipper individuals.
The Ultra Violence

Not the sort of thing to spring on a mild Monday.
If this is how my day is getting started, I might be dead before noon.


Originally uploaded by alflamont.
I went to a bar and two guys walk in wearing bunny costumes. I'm talking to this girl, and I told her I was unimpressed. She says, "Don't hate."

I explain to her that it's cheating to wear a bunny costume. You don't have to be interesting, you don't have to make conversation, it's all prefabricated.

Hey how you doing?
Oh my gawd you're dressed like a bunny!
So I am, wanna hear about it?

Whereas the rest of us have to actually BE interesting,these guys just went out and bought bunny costumes. It's not like they had them lying around, or were on their way to a Bunny Ball. THAT's interesting.This has the stink of premeditated attention getting.

By the time I finished my argument, I turned to see that she was talking to the bunny guy.

Evil bastards. IS wearing a bunny costume any different than honing your wit? Or Being an original thinker? They all serve the purpose of picking up chicks in bars. The only difference is that a Bunny costume is a lot more transparent, and takes less time to acquire. Have I been wasting my time?

No. Wit and originality are life-skills that can be used in the grocery store, or at restaurants. A Bunny costume has limited uses.

Do I qualify as a hater?

Sunday, April 17, 2005

Mea Culpa

Originally uploaded by alflamont.
I did something naughty. Something I swore I would never do. I had a friend sleep over, and I put the moves on her. There's a past there, and I felt like it was perfectly reasonable, but I shouldn't have, and now she's pissed. I'm buying flowers tonight, but I feel like such an ass.

It was a minor thing, but it sort of turned it a big thing after the fact.

Stupid hormones.
Stupid me.

There's more . I missed a good friend's big play. To my credit I was @ work till 9 on that day. Still...I suck

Oh yeah one more thing.
I'm supposed to do dishes, and I'm too lazy.

Ok, let's just make this a purging, shall we?
I don't really like Radiohead, or Dave Matthews. Same Jam band, different obsesed lame-ass fans. Sorry.

Sex in the City, Friends, and Will and Grace, might as well be the same sucky show. I could care less. Sorry about that too

I kind of like reading about how trashy Britney Spears is. Have mercy.

I rented The Dreamers, only for the sex scenes. Filthy Filthy!

Monty Python often dissapoints me. I remember it being funnier. Mea Maxima Culpa.

I hate loud music. No, i'm not too old, i never have liked loud music.

I have connived against people in happy relationships, because I have a crush on the girl, and if I can't have her... no one will.

I pick my nose, ears and my teeth in a disgusting manner, and I don't care because it's so gratifying.

Abba has to be one of the best bands ever, and I stop myself from playing it at bars and jukeboxes because it's "Too Gay"

I like football games, I like the Broncos, I hate talking about football. I have memorized statistics simply to be able to hold my own, but don't seriously care.

If someone's pissed at me I usually ignore them untill they get over it. Employers, Parents, and Significant others included.

I'm being a total wuss about getting my tonsils out.

I act like I'm ok with my break-up, but I'm really psychotic and jealous.

I resent people who are motivated and honest.

Guys who sculpt their eyebrows piss me off.

I can't watch people make asses of themselves on TV it stresses me out.

I feel guilty about writing this, but excited someone might read it.

Mea Culpa, Mea Maxima Culpa

Friday, April 15, 2005

New name, new tude

That's right. No more of the human interest shit. I'm gonna rock this blog like a twenty year old hotel employee. Not one in particular, mind you. It's just an expression.

shpping container tno pArkingDSC00055e
\"A\" is for Atlantic
jews for?WIG

Friday, April 01, 2005

Peace Out, Pope

Originally uploaded by alflamont.
Oh, i can hear your sneers now. Once more the populist, revolutionary, liberal, humanist Alf declares his catholic roots.

Let me give you a wee Papal timeline.

Alf Born in 1976
Karol Wolykstdhtysja Made pope John Paul II in 1978
Visits Mexico and Blesses a baby Alf during his visit

Alf Moves to US in 1980
Pope Shot in 1980
Young Alf not involved, but suspected anyway

Alf Graduates High School in 1995
Pope Visits Colorado in 1995
Alf stays awake all night, and misses half the papal mass. Buys a sweet foam Pope hat, and an awesome pope t-shirt. Also a Vatican Visor. Buys Pope on a rope for dad.

Alf Graduates college in 2000
Pope's health begins to decline
Not related to beer bongs we are told

Alf moves to LA in 2002
Popes health deteriorates to "Twitching stage"

Alf starts a new job, new life, new place.
Pope dying/dies

I've spent my entire life, my youth following this man as the head of my church. Regardless, of how our views differ regarding shagging, abortion, and virtually everything, the Holy Father has guided me through my youth. It's difficult to imagine, but as he enterts immortality, I enter adulthood.
yeah, yeah, creepy and sentimental I know.

Nontheless I'll say a wee prayer tonight.

Peace out JP2

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