Unseen Transformers Trailer!!!

From 1986



We've come a long way, baby.

The Five Exclamation Points

"And all those exclamation points? Five? A sure sign of someone who wears his underpants on his head." -Terry Prachett

Last night my brother and i attended the 29th anniversary to-do of Animal House. as lovely as it was seeing an aging Flounder and Stork (My brother said it was like meeting a line from a Robert Frost Poem). As lovely as the walk down memory lane was, the highlight of the evening came as my brother and I were boozily ambling down Hollywood boulevard. We came across the L. Ron Hubbard Life Exhibit. To begin with I must urge everyone to take a moment and visit. Like it or not, Scientology is here to stay, and a visit to a free museum dedicated to its founding is an important eye opener for everyone.



Our guide, a lovely blonde who was perky and doe eyed, Was Smart enough to tell we were both squiffy but interested. So she agreed to give us a quikie version of the tour. After some rather lofty claims of an accelerated intelligence and a breezing over of Sci-fi, we came to the e-meters where my younger brother abruptly broke the unspoken agreement we had by asking about E-Levels. "Boo-Hiss!" i exclaimed. Pointing out that we were here as guests and did not know enough to start prodding around. Our guide made an uncomfortable reference to South Park and US weekly, and we moved on. After a quick walk through the basic tenets of Scientology (Don't Murder, Be Competent, etc.) we were done, and rather pleased with the whole exxperience. Naturally we felt it all a crock, but it had been a Lovely tour. So my brioother and I began to discuss the phenomenon of the five exclamation points. You can be perfectly civil, enjoying someone's company, and the next moment they can say something so entirely insane, so ridiculous, that your perception of the person goes south, forever.

A motivational poster we can all relate to

I created this beauty after my friend told me he hated himself, I replied "All good people hate themselves."

Copywright Pending.

Sic Transit Eugen Weber

"No WUNdah the RRRomans ate PahStah in thee sisTAINE chapel." The queer cadences of the Hungarian Born, Paris Educated professor of European History are familiar to students everywhere. THE WESTERN TRADITION is the primer for all students of History and Eugen Weber is the voice, face, and incredibly sopoforic master of the PBS lecture series. For me, he filled in the gaps of the basic European history texts of my High School career.

He may not be too important to too many people, but he and his series help cement my love for History and in a wider sense my love of knowledge. His Death at the age of 84 last week would have gone by unnoticed by me had not my closest friend alerted me of his passing today. I was planning on being clever and making fun of Eugen for his accent and sideburns, but truth be told, since this may be one of the few random Eugen Eulogies on the web, I'll leave the prof alone, and allow him to do the lecturing.

Nippley man I met, he ate my motorboat!

The Death of Falwell and Liberal Guilt

When i found out that Jerry Falwell had died, I can't help but admit that I felt a tinge of joy. Being someone who actually does value life, not just Straight, Unborn, White, American Life, , i felt an immediate surge of guilt at my momentary glee. Surely this round, born-again turd, has redeeming values. His family will be sad, and that makes me sad. His followers will be dismayed, and I'm sure its a great loss to his school. But how else can we feel? As thinking, rational, individuals we MUST sigh a collective relief when such a voice of polarizing hatred is silenced. Had he been murdered, we could all exclaim in a unified manner "Horror!" or "Wrong!". What emotion best befits the passing of a man such as this? The same emotion that we all felt when we learned about Louis Farrakhan's Cancer, or The Demise of Ferdinand Marcos. Such men deserve the pity and sorrow of none but their followers, and an indifferent shrug from the rest of us.

Rev. Jerry Farewell

He died this week, at age 73. If any of you aren't sure why all the fuss, this is the guy who was screaming that the teletubbies are gay. It was his lawsuit against Larry Flynt (For a parody where he shags his mom in an outhouse) that insured for the rest
of us that public figures can be parodied and satirized. Other than his ultimately fraudulent lawsuit THIS is what he is known for:

Jerry Falwell's greatest hits:

# “AIDS is not just God's punishment for homosexuals; it is God's punishment for the society that tolerates homosexuals”

# "It appears that America's anti-Biblical feminist movement is at last dying, thank God, and is possibly being replaced by a Christ-centered men's movement which may become the foundation for a desperately needed national spiritual awakening."

# "If you're not a born-again Christian, you're a failure as a human being."

# After the September 11 attacks Falwell said, “I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People For the American Way, all of them who have tried to secularize America. I point the finger in their face and say 'you helped this happen."

# “Christians, like slaves and soldiers, ask no questions”

# “[Homosexuals are] brute beasts...part of a vile and satanic system [that] will be utterly annihilated, and there will be a celebration in heaven."



Charming.

ObAMANIA2!

Some footage from the Obama Rally we attended a few months back. If any of you are on the fence about Barack, I urge you to listen to him speak.

Just a taste mind, you.

Bye Bye, Bo Bo.

Boris Yeltsin died today. Let's remember my favorite moments with BoBo, shall we?

Something out of Borat.



Bobo and Bubba have a laugh over an incorrect translation.



Bobo throws a lady into the Ocean.

My trip to Europe: In sights and sounds

Glory be to you-tube and its simple uploading.Through the Magic of my digital camera and YouTube I am able to bring you sights and sounds from my recent trip to Europe.

THE ROYAL MILE IN EDINBURGH SCOTLAND

After a day parading around Edinburgh Castle, and doing the tourist thing, I was very excited to see a piper in the old streets of Edinburgh. Unfortunaely the film option doesn't work like the camera option (Duh) and I turn the whole thing on its side.



ORGAN GRINDER I AMSTERDAM

So i'm on the streets of Amsterdam, and this organ grinder is rocking out, when a street sweeper walks by with a funny little cameo with his giant street vacuum.



NOTRE DAME DOUBLE-HEADER

"The bells! They Ring for me! This one is Isabella, she made me deaf, you know."


The Organist inside the cathedral rocks a tune in the way that only a Pipe Organist in a Gothic Cathedral can...creepily

My Generation

I promise to Blog with finality about my triip, and all the other insane stuff I've ebeen up to. However, at the moment the muse does not strike, and I am forced/please to present the Zimmers. Old music made new By Old people.

Easterdam and Paree Le Fou

Sorry about the scant blogging, but my torpidity has dealt a furious blow to my beloved Mac in the form of a gnarly, broke-ass screen. Mercifully my travel companion, the Indiana-born, self proclaimed "Picky Eater" , Mr. Kenneth Christie, is toting around his inferior, but nonetheless useful DELL. So I had a few realizations about Amsterdam.Primarily the Netherlands are referred to as such because they are nether..far..far from anything interesting. In lieu of actual culture or lively intellectual movements, the Dutch have opted for Drug Use and whoring, which of course,made it our first stop.

Easter in Dutch is called Paas. Yes, like the egg decorating kits. They are owned by a Dutch company. If you color Eggs with PAAS, you are supporting prostitution anddrug-use.


Oh, look! A quaint Dutch Brothel. Lovely weather for Easter Whoring, huh guys?


In case you had any questions about how sex obsessed Amsterdam is...


Then its off to Paris, with the madman who changed the Lulus menu to read "Freedom Fries". I was determined to show Kenny a good time in Paris. But first, some culture.


Notre Dame. No, there is no football here. No that's not a cheerleader.



No Kenny, you're not supposed to take a picture of.. Kenny ..Kenny?



As a matter of fact, I DO know what "Voulez vous coucher avec mois" means.

At the moment, we are in London, and tomorrow is the super speedy all access deeply emotional and thorough one-day London Tour, as given by anglophile extraoridnaire and owner of the 5 CD set of Simon Schama's "A History of Britain"- Me.

London Calling

Yesterday, Danielle and I hit London and went on a Champagne Flight of the London Eye, the giant ferris wheel with beautiful panoramic views of London. Afterwatrds we mingled with the locals.


Look, kids! Big Ben, Parliament.


The EYE! THE EYE!


Oi! Oi! Oi!

Scotland the Brave

Edinburgh has proven to be a city of revelations. Primarily I have been shocked to find out that Haggis is more prevalent than I ever imagined. The thing is, its not a sheep's bladderin gooey grossness like you'd imagine, but rather more like bad thanksgiving stuffing. At a Pub we stopped at for a drink, there were Nachos offered with Ground Beef, Chicken, Or Haggis. Haggis Nachos. Last night was Danielle's Birthday and we rocked the Haggis and the Angus Beef at a traditional Restaurant Named DUBH PRAIS , which I highly reccomend, and this fine morning we hit Edinburgh Castle.

The Castle from afar



The Gates of Edinburgh Castle With Statues of Robert The Bruce and Mel Gibson


Castle Interior


Amazingly enough there are a lot of Kilts being worn in the Scottish capital. I mean, you don't see many sombreros in mexico or lederhosen in Berlin, but here people will wear anything as long as its plaid.


Maybe its just a tourist thing...

Ah, the Derry Air

Well, in my political tour of Ireland, I've arrived at the most put upon city on earth. None other than Derry city. The site of the famed "Bloody Sunday" of U2 fame. Of course, there were Murals to be seen, and politics to discuss, so enjoy the photos because tomorrow you get a dose of Edinburgh, right up the kilt.


The Bogside, and the iconic "Free Derry Wall"

The parents of this girl asked the artists to paint a pupae in cocoon on the bottom right of the mural. With the condition that the butterfly be added only when Peace had been achieved in Derry.


Evidently Peace has arrived.

Well... Mostly

Bu its a far cry from the lunatic Violence this beautiful city has known in the past.

Dublin in pictures

Thanks to my Singaporian Friend, i managed to get this thing going JUST as I'm about to leave Dublin. I'll give you all a full recount when I'm on the train to Derry, but in the meantime here's a few photos.

The GPO I spoke about in the previous post.


A lamppost


Kilmainham Gaol...which was AWESOME. Really exciting stuff.

Erin Go Wireless

So I'm in Dublin, and Ive found that my damn computer wont hook up to wireless. Furthermore Irish keyboards do not provide handy keys such as the apostrophe and the at sign or quotation marks. At least none that I can be bothered to find. howevfer, be pleased to know that I am presently standing in the General Post Office where the Heroes of 1916 were all gunned down for failing to rally a nmation too busy with their morning pint. Awesomely enough there are still bullet holes present on the columns where the English unloaded on the Republicans who were armed with wit and satire.

In the meantime Ill leave you with this portrait of the ever-popular Michael Collins who was known for negotiating an awesome treaty that created almost 60 years of internal conflict in Ireland, and who was also well know for having ill-fitting gloves.

Liveblogging My Euro trip!

This bescraved and dashing international, jetsetting Man of Mystery will be blogging daily from Europe. First Stop: Dublin! After a Five hour layover in O'Hare, landing in heathrow, a taxi to Euston Station, a Train Ride to Holyhead, and a Ferry Ride .

I should look mighty haggard by the time the ferry docks in Dublin..and Yes, there will be pictures.


Oddly Enough, my Brother who doesn't believe in the magic of mapquest may want to opt for Google Maps and their simple NY to Dublin Directions
I'm especially fond of step # 23 .

Check in Frequently.

HOLLA!

Librarians are hiding something!

Less than five minutes ago, Stephen Colbert and a guy from the EFF essentially dared Bloggers to break copyright by using the Quote "Librarians are hiding something.". Let's indulge him and Proliferate the phrase! Link up, Blog about it, whatever it takes.
EFF and Colbert Nation, forever!

The Ancient Book of Myth and War is HERE!

Last night I went to one of the best art openings i've been to in a while. Endlessly better than the Mark Ryden clusterfuck, THE ANCIENT BOOK OF MYTH AND WAR which I blogged about in OCTOBER of last year, is the collective work of PIXAR artists:

Scott Morse

Lou Romano

Don Shank

And

Nate Wragg


I had to haul my ass all the way to ALHAMBRA where I was extremely pleased with the manner that the Nucleus Gallery had set up the whole shebang. My friend, Jenifer bought an original piece by Scott Morse and I went Zany on the prints, buying four by Scott Morse and Two by Nate Wragg. The ABOMAW is an incredible exhibit, and a worthwhile jaunt to Alhabra. If however you can't seem to make it there, I highly reccomend you order the book on Amazon. It is some astounding artistic evidence that PIXAR is the preeminent source of animation and home to some of the finest artists around.