Gonzo Photography

M+B & AMMO books are having a gallery opening TOMORROW with Photographs by the late Dr. Hunter S. Thompson. As fate would have it, I'll also be attending A John Waters Christmas that very night. I am secure in the fact that this will be a MOST surreal evening. Kindly Click on Either of the Images to View the details of the Events. See you at either, or both.

A very merry DWP Christmas

Last night, I walked in 48 degree weather (YES! I KNOW! 48 degrees in LA means Death!) through a uniquely Angelino experience. The LA Department of Water and Power Festival of Lights. I must say, it was a damn treat, and made me proud to be an Angelino. Check it out:


Did You know that? A hunnerd years! In LA years that's like a gazillion years.
NO, THAT"S NOT SNOW! I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THAT IS.


LAX-cellent! Note the plane, it "Moves".


The Port of Los Angeles, with seawater that glows!


Griffith Park Observatory, where even Poppa Smurf has to wait in an endless line to see a star.


Surf's up! This is the bacterial infection and drainage display.


This is either Muscle Beach in Venice or 24 Hour fitness in West Hollywood, we weren't quite sure.


Speaking of which, our schlonggy city hall made more schlonggy by my inability to rotate before uploading.



William Mulholland (Two gazillion LA Years Old), and the LA aqueduct. Yes, that is human waste floating at the top left hand side of the aqueduct.


The Staples Center, with the Kings. No, there's no room for Kobe this Christmas. Near butt rape disqulaifies you from the display. Sorry.


And finally a Fuel Cell. With the Words "Fuel Cell" all lit up. Ahaha..ha. herm..hmm. DWP humor.

You can see all of this Live with music every night untill A non religious date after Christmas, from 4 Pm- to 10 Pm, somewhere by the Zoo. Just look for the annoyed coyotes.

Panda Porn (NSFW)

Evidently Pandas around the world seem to have a major issue on their hands. They can't seem to do the proverbial "Panda Nasty". Far be it for me to judge the gentle giants of Asia, but if that basic skill eludes your species, then perhaps extinction is an inevitabilty. Regardless, scientists who feel more ompassion for the beasties than i do, have decided that the best way to get the silly, duochromatic, snuggle-monsters to hump, is to show them Panda Erotica. Read the yawnfully dreadful story on CNN

HERE!

ENTER THE CITIZEN MEDIA

The notion of panda porn has spawned Panda Porn Dot ORG, a hilarious and deliciously crude series of panda porn...erm videos.

Click the Icon for all the naughty Pandaness

The Happiest Place on Earth Gets All Sorts of Jolly

This last weekend I spent two days at Disneyland.

Amazing what a large corporation will do to celebrate the Holidays.
LIVE REINDEER. And that was just the start. Take a look at some of the photographic highlights of my Disney weekend

HERE!

The Yellow Rose of Dickinson

As i was listening to NPR today I came across an interesting factoid:


Most, if not all of Emily Dickinson's poetry can be sung to the tune of THE YELLOW ROSE OF TEXAS.

Oh, I know, I know. Why would anyone under 50 know THE YELLOW ROSE OF TEXAS, and who cares about Emily Dickinson?

Well for starters, its good to know local songs when traveling. On many occasions I've been welcomed into the fold by xenophobic villagers for knowing the words to ROSAMUNDE, KALINKA, EIN PROSIT, O SOLE MIO, BRAZIL, and JAMBO BWANA. Furthermore I would argue that TEXANS are more likely to tote guns, and therefore being on their good side while amongst them can be an effective tool. Especially if you are a swarthy California liberal, as I am.

As for Dickinson, well... Just try it. For you teachers out there, this might be a useful tool for gettng those students to memorize "Because I could not stop for Death, He kindly stopped for me"

In case you doubt, and is there REALLY a reason you should?

Emily Dickinson's poetry can be found

HERE!

And the tune to the YELLOW ROSE OF TEXAS can be found

HERE!

Thanksgiving crawl

Danielle and I made stops at three Thanksgiving celebrations yesterday. Thanks to all our friends for being such wonderful hosts!



Please take a look at some pictures from our soirees

HERE!

Turkeys, the lot of em'

This Poem by William S. Burroughs is eerily prophetic considering the state of "Heightened Security" this nation seems to be in.


Thanksgiving Day, Nov. 28, 1986
William S. Burroughs
For John Dillinger
In hope he is still alive

Thanks for the wild turkey and the Passenger Pigeons, destined to be shit out through wholesome American guts —

thanks for a Continent to despoil and poison —

thanks for Indians to provide a modicum of challenge and danger —

thanks for vast herds of bison to kill and skin, leaving the carcass to rot —

thanks for bounties on wolves and coyotes —

thanks for the AMERICAN DREAM to vulgarize and falsify until the bare lies shine through —

thanks for the KKK, for nigger-killing lawmen feeling their notches, for decent church-going women with their mean, pinched, bitter, evil faces —

thanks for "Kill a Queer for Christ" stickers —

thanks for laboratory AIDS —

thanks for Prohibition and the War Against Drugs —

thanks for a country where nobody is allowed to mind his own business —

thanks for a nation of finks — yes,

thanks for all the memories... all right, let's see your arms... you always were a headache and you always were a bore —

thanks for the last and greatest betrayal of the last and greatest of human dreams.

Fetal Fauna

Holy Moly!

It seems scientists haverecently taken some AMAZING pictures of anumals in utero.

Check this out!





You can see a few more pictures, including a fetal Dolphin

HERE!

For the sophisticated palate..

Due to popular demand, I will now share with you all my mother's famous Thanksgiving stuffing recipe.



1 cup melted butter
1 1/2 cups chopped onions
1 1/2 cups chopped celery
6 cups diced, tart apples (green/old granny)
2 teaspoons of salt
1 cup sugar
6 cups of small bread crumbs (herb seasoned)

In large pan combine butter, apples, celery and onions. Sprinkle with salt and sugar. Cook for 10 minutes until apples are browned all over. Add bread cubes.
Yields 12 cups.

De mi propia cosecha

si haces el doble, no dobles la sal, a lo mejor la mitad pero primero pruebalo. Toma mas de 10 minutos a que agarren color las manzana, al menos en Colorado. Una vez que este todo revuelto incluyendo pan, le pones ya sabes que. Vino blanco, siempre cocina con vino barato. Abusado con el vino si le pones mucho te queda muy aguado.

Si tu vas a rellenar el pavo, antes de poner el relleno untas adentro del pavo mantequilla con seasoned salt y sage y tambien afuera. Abusado con la sal.

Now stuff it, you turkeys.

Happy Brithday, Bobby.

"Let us dedicate ourselves to what the Greeks wrote so many years ago: to tame the savageness of man and make gentle the life of this world. Let us dedicate ourselves to that."



He would have been 81 today.

The Day Kerouac Met Allen

One of the strangest but most wonderful moments on television. Jack Kerouac, looking intensely uncomfortable untill he starts reading his poetry and Steve Allen Does a Bang-Up job of providing some jazzy music.

SA: How would you define the word "Beat"?
JK: Sympathetic

Solid.

Jumpin' the gun, are ya boyo?

Oh you may scoff and snort, but its never too early, as you'll note on my handy countdown to St. Patrick's day at the bottom of my page. And this year, it'll be a whole new residence, woth my like-minded brother in tow.
And may I remind you all, this year The Feast of Saint Patrick falls on a Saturday? No excuses! None! You will all be there!

Throwback to a colorful innocence

Sesame street. After a day of whoring around in Hollywood, there's something very soothing about people who's work it is to create objects for the free expression of children's imginations. Kindly note, the workers look almost serene.

Animated Content of the Week

Both of these involve animals who are dreamers.

Kiwi will win an Academy Award Is My Guess.


And then, there's Potapych: The Bear Who Loved Vodka
Which SHOULD win an Academy award

Watch it

HERE!

Why Rudy will not be president.

Ok, this is my last political post for a while.

But i want you guys to know that Rudy Guiliani is a Jerk. He's too liberal for conservatives, and too much a pecker-head for liberals.

Communist Manifestoon

If you have 8 minutes, I encourage you to take a look at this reading of the communist manifesto interpreted by cartoons.

Oh! Oh! Oh!

He crapped bigger than me.. 1919-2006

Jack Palance: Actor, Lover, Perfumier? Poet? Jesus! Who wants to smell like cigarettes and TNT movies?
Jack Palance was eastern European, which certainly explains why he looked pissed off for most of his life.
Still, he was extremely influential in my youth when he creepily hosted RIPLEY'S BELIEVE IT OR NOT. His odd pauses and whispered emphysema induced rasp, convinced me at an early age, to not carve a niche for myself in westerns.

That's it. I didn't like City Slickers as much as everyone else, but i'm sad to see his crazy ass go.

Oh yeah! You can get the book of Poetry!!

HERE!

Sympatico

Indefensible Secretary

Here are my two favorite images for the day.
The first should be self explanatory to Mac Users. The second, bears a little explaining.

It is a screenshot of wikipedia's entry on Robert Gates (Rummy's replacement). I was listening to an interview with the guy who created wiki, and he said that incorrect information is usually on there for less than a minute. This means one of two things: 1. this picture was taken within seconds of the new posting. Or 2. the posting was purposely left as such for a while.

Still.. you gotta love the citizen media.

Check out the new "vandalism free" entry.

How I spent my Election Day

I spent the morning at this fine spot.


I spent the day with this these fine gents.


And then spent the evening with these fine folk.

How sweet it is.

This is the official Photograph of the midterm election 2006



Allow me to explain. Rick Santorum conceding, while one of his dozen children weeps. Beyond everything, his poindexter son decides to give this hellbound, godless, Osama-Loving , nation - the bird.



Allow me to say it loud and clear. Tester has declared victory. Webb has declared victory. Barring dirty tricks and whining from Allen and Burns the Democrats control BOTH HOUSES!

Our nation has finally put a seven-fingered buzz-cut farmer in the Senate. God bless these United States of America!

The NYT explains it all.

This is from the NYT editorial page, and it just about sums up this year's elections.

November 5, 2006
Editorial
The Difference Two Years Made

On Tuesday, when this page runs the list of people it has endorsed for election, we will include no Republican Congressional candidates for the first time in our memory. Although Times editorials tend to agree with Democrats on national policy, we have proudly and consistently endorsed a long line of moderate Republicans, particularly for the House. Our only political loyalty is to making the two-party system as vital and responsible as possible.

That is why things are different this year.

To begin with, the Republican majority that has run the House — and for the most part, the Senate — during President Bush’s tenure has done a terrible job on the basics. Its tax-cutting-above-all-else has wrecked the budget, hobbled the middle class and endangered the long-term economy. It has refused to face up to global warming and done pathetically little about the country’s dependence on foreign oil.

Republican leaders, particularly in the House, have developed toxic symptoms of an overconfident majority that has been too long in power. They methodically shut the opposition — and even the more moderate members of their own party — out of any role in the legislative process. Their only mission seems to be self-perpetuation.

The current Republican majority managed to achieve that burned-out, brain-dead status in record time, and with a shocking disregard for the most minimal ethical standards. It was bad enough that a party that used to believe in fiscal austerity blew billions on pork-barrel projects. It is worse that many of the most expensive boondoggles were not even directed at their constituents, but at lobbyists who financed their campaigns and high-end lifestyles.

That was already the situation in 2004, and even then this page endorsed Republicans who had shown a high commitment to ethics reform and a willingness to buck their party on important issues like the environment, civil liberties and women’s rights.

For us, the breaking point came over the Republicans’ attempt to undermine the fundamental checks and balances that have safeguarded American democracy since its inception. The fact that the White House, House and Senate are all controlled by one party is not a threat to the balance of powers, as long as everyone understands the roles assigned to each by the Constitution. But over the past two years, the White House has made it clear that it claims sweeping powers that go well beyond any acceptable limits. Rather than doing their duty to curb these excesses, the Congressional Republicans have dedicated themselves to removing restraints on the president’s ability to do whatever he wants. To paraphrase Tom DeLay, the Republicans feel you don’t need to have oversight hearings if your party is in control of everything.

An administration convinced of its own perpetual rightness and a partisan Congress determined to deflect all criticism of the chief executive has been the recipe for what we live with today.

Congress, in particular the House, has failed to ask probing questions about the war in Iraq or hold the president accountable for his catastrophic bungling of the occupation. It also has allowed Mr. Bush to avoid answering any questions about whether his administration cooked the intelligence on weapons of mass destruction. Then, it quietly agreed to close down the one agency that has been riding herd on crooked and inept American contractors who have botched everything from construction work to the security of weapons.

After the revelations about the abuse, torture and illegal detentions in Abu Ghraib, Afghanistan and Guantánamo Bay, Congress shielded the Pentagon from any responsibility for the atrocities its policies allowed to happen. On the eve of the election, and without even a pretense at debate in the House, Congress granted the White House permission to hold hundreds of noncitizens in jail forever, without due process, even though many of them were clearly sent there in error.

In the Senate, the path for this bill was cleared by a handful of Republicans who used their personal prestige and reputation for moderation to paper over the fact that the bill violates the Constitution in fundamental ways. Having acquiesced in the president’s campaign to dilute their own authority, lawmakers used this bill to further Mr. Bush’s goal of stripping the powers of the only remaining independent branch, the judiciary.

This election is indeed about George W. Bush — and the Congressional majority’s insistence on protecting him from the consequences of his mistakes and misdeeds. Mr. Bush lost the popular vote in 2000 and proceeded to govern as if he had an enormous mandate. After he actually beat his opponent in 2004, he announced he now had real political capital and intended to spend it. We have seen the results. It is frightening to contemplate the new excesses he could concoct if he woke up next Wednesday and found that his party had maintained its hold on the House and Senate.







Please be sure to check out the NYT online's free week.

Alien Loves Predator...

My good Friend Mac sent me this . I love it.



For More of ALP click

HERE

Thanks Mac!

Haggard The Horrible

Aside from Pastor Ted's gay meth issues, it seems like m old nemesis "Dr." Ken Hovlind (The Intelligent Design/ Ani Evolutionist) will be going to the slammer. Read about it

HERE

And while we are on the subject....

Luke 6:42 - How can you say to your brother, 'Brother, let me take the speck out of your eye,' when you yourself fail to see the plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.

CREEPY!

Mr. LaMont goes to Washington..

Yes my dear friends, I'll be in DC Monday night, and ALL of election day on Tuesday supporting the Lamonts of Connecticut. I'll be back on Wednesday. In the meantime, Dare to dream...