RORD OF THE LINGS

Asian LOTR Poster
Originally uploaded by alflamont.

Ok, so this is the last stop on my tour of Asia. Japanese Businessmen, North Korean children and now this!

Here's the concept. Pirated copies of LORD OF THE RINGS dubbed in Chinese, make their way back to the US with Engrish subtitles. Unfortunately our asian friends can't quite grasp the tounges of middle earth, so they give it their best shot.

Enjoy.

Creepy North Korean Children

kumsusap
Originally uploaded by alflamont.

North Korea is probably the most militarized society in the world. Most of their Currency, artwork, and emtertainment stems from two things: The adulation of their Impish Dictator, or the Destruction of their enemies.

As charming as this family programming is, the North Korean Government has a secret weapon against naysayers in the west. The children of the People's Rpublic of Korea, are propped up by the government as an example of how well the country is doing. Nevermind the Famine, and overwhleming poverty. The performing arts schools of Pyongyang are pumping out creppy little Jon Benets by the handful.
Here are the creepiest ones, thanks to our Japanese Friend RobPongi

The most Bizzare Exercise Video Ever
My Parent's Kiss
Little Girls Bending Themselves
Grapes Of Love
Xylophone Girl

What sort of Lawrence Welk hell this is all coming from is beyond me, but maybe they should spend more time feeding their own than pretending like everything his hunky-dory.

We attacked Saddam under the belief that he was murdering his own people, and preparing WMDs against us. Here is an entire society ruled by a dictator, with a CULTURE of "Death to the US" and a real and obvious Nuclear program. Why do we leave them alone?

Why is North Korea not attacked, but Afghanistan and Iraq who barely have two sticks to rub together are blasted back to the stone age?

Bush: Real Problems - No Solutions.

Namesake

fatalfkid
Originally uploaded by alflamont.

I've finally decided to accept my furry namesake, in a detached sor of way. Admittedly there's a lot of funny ALF stuff out there. This Kinder-Puff was the straw that broke the proverbial camel's back. Quite simply, if he can stand pleased as punch with that thing emblazoned on his bitty man boobs, then I think I can handle it. I like to imagine he's decked out and has a lunchbox to match. This Lardy Lad is putting on the ritz, and I have to grin and say "Uncle".

Potty-Mouth

alfgun
Originally uploaded by alflamont.

OK, so I showed My dad the Blog, and he expressed displeasure at some of the course Language. I'm thinking, Should I change or edit it so my dad can see it? Or is this my mini corner of the world where I can say what I feel? Ashcroft has resigned, and Dad, sorry but I'm afraid the pottymouthedness stays.

Working 9 to 5 (In the morning the next day)

Ok, I work hard, I enjoy working. The Busier, the better. But duuuude, don't let it come to this. Never ever let it hapen to you. Japan, we have to change this. This is why your suicide rates are the highest in the world.

New Yorker To Angelino

Angelinos is how it's spelled, not Angelenos as certain magazines would have you beleive. People who reside in El Pueblo de Nuestra Señora la Reina de los Angeles de Porciúncula are Angelinos. People who don't understand the nuances of foreign tounges and move here from the midwest thinking they can slaughter language and monikers through ignorant misspellings, they can be Angelenos if they like. So my initial and extremely snotty remarks on my adopted city aside, I have noticed how strangely apologetic Angelinos are about our fair city. Perhaps my latin blood feels a greater affinity for the Spanish heritage of los angeles than the pasty Anglo roots of northern cities, but I beleive Los Angeles to be superior to New York in many ways.

Oh the scoffs from the New Yorkers who adore their cramped lifestyles and unsanitary public transport. Take you embittered and frozen island, and shove it. Seriously, I've had enough of this. Don't get me wrong there's cool stuff there, but nothing cooler than here, and certainly no viable beaches or weather to write home about. People aren't as attractive, the cuisine is a bit heavier, the health stores more sparse. There something like three supermarkets in New York, and people wig out when they see a Target or a Best Buy. So maybe Fast food sucks, but when youre poor it's a lifesaver. And maybe you can run on fumes when youre driving, but you certainly can't get anywhere in NYC without cash for the subway. New York is cool, yeah, maybe as cool as LA, but certainly not cooler. Clubs? We got em. Bars? We Got Em. Museums? We got those things as well, AND we have Celebrities and the beach.

My Friend Sam just moved here from NY she has lived there all her life, and she will be my ultimate test subject. She is a child of the city to be sure, raised on the false notion that New York has anything to do with the entertainment industry. A talented, and attractive young lady who recently came of a show very dear to my heart, I have no doubt that she is of the right stuff, not only to make an Angelino, but a sucessful working actress. She will be my proof to all my struggling artistic friends of NY that the tanned laid back manner of LA is not only more comfortable, but more profitable. What can I say? I Love LA!

I Swear this is it..after this no more Election stuff.

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/allnews/tm_objectid=14832124%26method=full%26siteid=50143%26headline=god%2dhelp%2damerica-name_page.html

IQ

http://chrisevans3d.com/files/iq.htm

Final Thoughts

My friend Alex, who is probably one of the most literate and well-spoken people I know summed it all up in this tidy note.


We have just witnessed the profound failure of the democratic agenda. While the numbers (economic, war-related costs and casualties, etc.) may favor John Kerry, democrats faced an insurmountable wall of resistance in trying to win the minds of opinionated Americans. Though America experiences a costly war, a national debt that climbs a few billion per week, a Presidential approval rating in the fortieth percentile, and a Massachusetts Senator who emerged victorious from three straight National debates, the voters of America decided that they could not trust Mr. Kerry to lead the country. Why, or How, we ask, could Bush votaries admit the tremendous faults of this administration, yet, when given the opportunity to opine, they shrivel up into a tight ball of resentment, distrust, or even hate, for the alternative? Popular opinion has become so generalized, so abstract, that nuance, detail, facts and figures now fail to sway individual minds. Rationality and reason, which at one time was the great promise of American democracy, have failed. These generalizations, such as "freedom" and "our traditional values" have erased the possibility for any critical reflection on what these terms actually mean. They now have a shallow definition, and the result is the individual American now submits to majority opinions, just as the medieval prince submitted to the knowledge of the Priest. The project of our founders - a society meant to free individuals from the slavery of opinion (divine, aristocratic, or majority) - has finally failed.
It may take years of educational reform to address this decline of the American mind.

The Day After

This is a conversation that I had with my friend the day after the election, about half an hour after Kerry's concession speech.

BenPatrickW: I can't believe I have to take 4 more years of this garbage

GrnLntrnAlf: You don't have to take it

GrnLntrnAlf: We can fight every inch of the wayBen

PatrickW: it is just such a dissapointment

BenPatrickW: we should have a system of checks and balances...what good is it to have Republican's control all 3 branches?

GrnLntrnAlf: It's not

GrnLntrnAlf: Let them wring their own necks.

BenPatrickW: why do you think the pilgrams escaped Europe...it was to escape this religious bullshit and be free

BenPatrickW: our nation is going right back to the fucking problems of our origin

GrnLntrnAlf: Ben I thought this was our time to finsih it off, you need to understand that the country will need a jolt. This slumber, this distraction, the blindness and self-importance will eventually reap what is deserved. It was Fiorello LaGuardia under pressure of a huge bribery scandal who said to the citizens of New York, "The People will get the government they deserve"

GrnLntrnAlf: As it stands our country in it's ridiculous, blind, rage does not deserve a good man like John Kerry.

GrnLntrnAlf: Keep the faith, fight the fight, and when the time comes for us to step-up and say "I told you so" let's be gracious.

BenPatrickW: I know

BenPatrickW: I just really lost a lot of faith in our nation

GrnLntrnAlf: I did too

GrnLntrnAlf: I feel like a foreigner

BenPatrickW: YES

BenPatrickW: I feel like I don't belong in this country

BenPatrickW: or we need to branch off and start a new nation

GrnLntrnAlf: Something tells me we are not the only ones

BenPatrickW: why waste all this time...we should be disputing issues that we are split on...serious issues

BenPatrickW: not dealing with fucking gay marriage and religious bullshit

GrnLntrnAlf: Ben, you and I know that this country is irresponsible towards it's citizens. There is a growing gap between the poor and rich, there is a health care crisis looming, the world no longer takes us seriously, and sees us as "Dangerous", we have wars we cannot pay for, we haven't enough troops, and our anti-terrorism measures are still harassing innocent citizens and seriously ignoring gaping holes in our security.

GrnLntrnAlf: These are facts. Eventually, the facts catch up with you, no matter how many gay people you manage to prevent from being happy, no matter how many flags you wave, and no matter how many prayers you send upwards.

BenPatrickW: the health care issue is a fucking mess. I was listening to the Sentate Majority leader this morning. He doesn't have a fucking clue how to improve the situation. They are incouraging people to set aside a savings for an emergency. That is a scary concept. We need to have a national healthcare plan.

GrnLntrnAlf: How's your savings acct.?

BenPatrickW: 0

BenPatrickW: yours?

GrnLntrnAlf: Same

GrnLntrnAlf: How do you manage to live on our salary?

BenPatrickW: I'm thinking of pushing drugs...or pimping ho's

GrnLntrnAlf: Seriously though, it's tough isn't it?

BenPatrickW: yes

BenPatrickW: my brother was given a $7000 tax break last year

BenPatrickW: do you think he needs that money?

GrnLntrnAlf: Most of our co-workers receive extra income from family, or trust-funds

BenPatrickW: do you know what he does with that money?

BenPatrickW: he gambles

BenPatrickW: meanwhile...I don't get shit for tax breaks

GrnLntrnAlf: We make more than the minimum wage, and we're not able to cover ourselves for an emergency.

GrnLntrnAlf: Who are the people making up these plans?

GrnLntrnAlf: Have they any idea of what a dishwasher does, makes, and how he lives?

GrnLntrnAlf: What are we going to do about Iran who recently passed overwhelmingly a resolution to continue their nuclear weapons program, to the shous of "Allah is Great, Death to the U.S"?

GrnLntrnAlf: This government will continue to ignore it, and truth be told, it's what this country needs. We need to buckle down and do what we can. Keep our fellow man in mind in our actions, and keep the voice of true moral opposition loud and clear.

BenPatrickW: I seriously don't know what to think anymore

GrnLntrnAlf: Me neither.

To our Conservative Friends

In your heart of hearts you know Bush is a miserable failure. From having no plan on what to do in Iraq once he conquered Baghdad to the 380 missing tons of explosives that could be used to kill our brave young men and women, this guy doesn¹t have a clue how to fight and win a war. You should see the mail I¹ve been getting lately from our troops over there. They know how much the Iraqi people hate them. They are sitting ducks anytime they go out on the road. Many believe we are not that far away from a Tet-style offensive inside the Green Zone with hundreds of Americans and Brits killed. Bush refused to go after and capture Osama bin Laden. He fought, every step of the way, the investigation into the 9/11 attacks. Who on earth would oppose such a thing? If 3,000 people died at your place of work and your boss said we don¹t need to find out why or how it happened, he¹d be thrown out on his ear. Bush¹s behavior after this great tragedy alone is reason enough for his removal. You already know that George W. Bush is the farthest thing from a conservative. He¹s a reckless spender who has run up record-breaking deficits and the biggest debt in our history. He believes in having the government pry into everything from your library records to your bedroom. He has hit you with hidden taxes with his tax cuts for the rich. I know many of you don¹t like Bush, but are unsure of Kerry. Give the new guy a chance. He won¹t raise your taxes (unless you are super-rich), he won¹t take your hunting gun away, and he won¹t make you visit France. He risked his life for you many years ago. He¹s asking for the chance to do it again. Scott McConnell at The American Conservative magazine has endorsed him. What more do you need?