Friday, February 06, 2009

Asking a Cult Member On a Date


I had met this girl at one of the thanksgiving dinners i was invited to. I had expressed early interest but a mutual friend (Who is also "In the program") had told me she doesn't date "Outside". I friended her on facebook and then this went down. Names and Dates have been changed to protect the innocent, including the group she was pandering for.

X
hey Alf
7:39pm

Alf
Hey X.
What a pleasant surprise.
7:39pm

X
How r u doing on a raining day
7:39pm

Alf
I am well.
Praying for the day to end.
7:40pm

X
lol
7:40pm

Alf
Seriosuly, I am beat. Long week.
You?
7:40pm

X
yes, arent we all
i had a down day today
but i am alright now:)
7:41pm

Alf
Oh yeah?
7:41pm

X
I heard that u were intersted in going basic?
7:41pm

Alf
Being down and rain are just awful
7:41pm

X
when r u gonna go! i am so excited
7:41pm

Alf
Go where?
7:41pm

X
the training that *** and I went
7:41pm

Alf
Hahaha
I think you mean ***.
7:42pm

X
I dont know who *** is
So iam sure *** meant u
7:42pm

Alf
***'s assitant
I'm pretty sure *** wouldn't make that error
7:42pm

X
well i dono why he said that then...
well are u going then?
7:43pm

Alf
No, i don't think so
7:43pm

X
oh..
7:44pm

Alf
Yeah, not a big "Feeling and action" guy.
More methodical here.
7:44pm

X
feeling and action?
7:44pm

Alf
But i appreciate you wanting to include me.
7:45pm

X
hehe, its good stuff. i can't imagine how anyone wouldnt want to go
but then again, u donno what it is lol
7:45pm

Alf
Ah, well. We all have our journeys to make.
7:47pm

X
ya
7:47pm

Alf
Not big into joint discovery. Bit of loner, finding my own way coming to conclusions etc.
7:49pm

X
i see. that is alright. we are who we are and that is what i love about it, it allows me to have my own experience. u can say its a joint, but its like doing yoga, i am with other people but i am working on my own pace and weakness
7:51pm

Alf
Yeah, I'm constantly working on myself just not in a group, not in front of others, accountable only to myself.
7:53pm

X
ya u didnt seem like u were comfortable with certain things being shown in public last time we hang out. i am just curious how do you do what you do being a reserved individual
7:53pm

Alf
I don't think anyone I know would call me reserved.
As for finding my own answers, yesterday I came to the conclusion that REDACTED
7:55pm

X
and u just came to this conclusion yesterday?
how would it be like if u had conclusions like that x100 within 5 days
7:57pm

Alf
It would bel like taking a life shortcut. I do not believe in shortcuts. I think discovering things on your own prepares you for the next step.
It would be like shooting a movie before writing a script
or writing a script before you have a story
7:58pm

X
I think you are midunderstanding something Alf
7:59pm

Alf
Explain.
7:59pm

X
This process is not someone telling you how to live your life or giving you answers. because we are the ONLY one who can answer ourselves
this is a designed experience that you will go through and have a professional coach evoke your answers
its through living and quetioning we learn and grow
and someone genius enough to design something like that
8:00pm

Alf
Why can't life just show me the answers as i go along? Need I pay a coach?
8:00pm

X
no u dont need to
8:01pm

Alf
So i could get the same answers just by living a gentle life.
8:01pm

X
but i wanted to learn faster, i wanted to be free from confusion faster, not waiting till i am 50 making many many mistakes and then realize
there is a beauty to that, but we are human and we wil make mistakes no matter what
8:03pm

X
i want to be able to love and liv the way i want to
8:03pm

Alf
I don't feel confusion though, and i very much live the way I want.
I could stand to make more money, but i am on track with where i thought i'd be.
8:03pm

X
well like i said its like yoga, people are at different lvl, of course u r much wiser than i am
8:06pm

Alf
Well, if you say so. I lived most of my early life with REDACTED, and i am on equal footing to REDACTED. I am constantly overcoming obstacles and enjoying myself tremendously while doing it.
8:06pm

X
then why r u so resistant toward something so beautiful that is design for powerful people like yourself?
8:08pm


Alf
Is anyone ever rejected from @@@@?
8:08pm

X
there are people who walked out in the middle of the training
and i know there was one lady was asked to leave
8:09pm

Alf
No, i mean when they come to you.
Is there anyone who you could look at and say "You are ok. You don't need this".
8:10pm

X
hehehe. are you thinking that i think you need this????
i would never tell anybody it is ok for you to not get an education.
this is a training i personally think should have been given when we were in high school
8:11pm

Alf
What sort of training would you say this is?
8:15pm

X
simply put, this is a very basic life training that made me aware of myself and gave me tools, so i would know exactly when to use them and be more effective, more efficient in every aspect of my life
i dont think i would realize many things that i realized during the training in any other situation another 5-10 yrs or maybe ever
8:23pm

Alf
I get it, but i don't feel that something that applies to everyone can be tailor made for me. Mine has been a singular journey. Though i believe in the inherency of the human experience, i believe in the wide scope of that experience. We are all singing the same song, just using different instruments.
8:23pm

X
hav you always been this arrogant?
8:24pm

Alf
No, only with salesmen.
8:24pm

HERE I DIDN”T SAVE ON TIME, BUT WE GLOSSED OVER THE TENSION. SOME EVANGELICALS USE THE WORD ARROGANT WHEN YOU USE LOGIC AGAINST THEM, AND I WAS LIVID. BUT SHE IS CUTE, SO I PRESSED ON. THE GIST OF IT WENT “REMEMBER THANKSGIVING?” (WHEN WE MET), THEN SHE SAID “I REMEMBER YOU STOLE SOMETHING FROM ME” (A SLIGHT KISS)

Alf
You want it back?
8:34pm

X
i never take my gift back
8:35pm

Alf
Wait, was it a gift or did I steal it?
5:35pm

X
u stole it first, then i gave it away
8:36pm

Alf
*** told me you only date guys who are on the program.
8:36pm

X
hahaaha
he is funny
8:37

Alf
Aha!
8:38pm

X
aha what
8:38pm

Alf
So you date guys outside of ****?
8:39pm

X
of course, **** doesnt represent men who are up to my standards
8:39pm

Alf
Oh, mercy!
I would LOVE to lower your standards for you.
8:40pm

X
hehehe
my standards arent that high, they are just specific
8:40pm

Alf
Do your standards involve ironic mustaches and bourbon?
8:41pm

X
my standards definetly includ being open to beautiful experiences
and trusting
8:41pm

Alf
Now THAT's something I can offer.
8:41pm

X
really
can i sign u up for this amazing experience then
8:42pm

HERE'S A BEAUTIFUL MOMENT. I MISREAD WHAT SHE WROTE AND THOUGHT SHE SAID "CAN YOU SIGN ME UP FOR THIS AMAZING EXPERIENCE?". SO FOR ONE MAGICAL MOMENT WE BOTH FEEL WE ARE GETTING WHAT WE WANT.

Alf
Hm...
Let, me see...
8:42pm

X
alright
think about it
8:42pm

Alf
We have a seminar on the 13th.
8:42pm

X
the next one is not till march
8:42pm

Alf
Friday the 13th
8:42pm

X
u have one month to think about
8:43pm

Alf
No no
8:43pm

X
what lol
8:43pm

Alf
I was asking you out on a date. On the 13th, except i was being clever by calling it a "Seminar"
8:43pm

X
LOL
friday?
8:43pm

Alf
Yeah, a week from today.
8:44pm

X
ok
but under one condition
8:44pm

Alf
Awesome.
Not if that condition involves ****
You have to go because you like me.
Not because you want me to do something.
8:45pm

X
do i look like someone with such a low self respect?
besides what is in it for me, i dont get anything by having u go
8:46pm

Alf
So what condition would you put on it?
8:46pm

X
that u will be open and seriously consider this experience of life
8:49pm

X
and i cant say i like you, i am curious about you is that ok for a date
8:50pm

Alf
Well, do you make out with guys you are curious about?
8:51pm

X
no
lol
8:51pm

Alf
I think that's your answer right there, then.
8:51pm

X
do u alway expect to make out with ur date on the first nite?
8:52pm

Alf
I allow for the possibility.
8:53pm

X
oh well, dear. thank you for allowing me expressing this awesome experience i just went through
but i got to leave now.
8:53pm

Alf
No problem.
8:54pm

X
my friend is having a play tonight
have a good weekend
8:54pm

Alf
Ah, what play?
8:54pm

X
i am not sure. its in pasadena city college
8:54pm

Alf
hah! You are a good friend.
Enjoy your play and your weekend.
8:55pm

X
of course. thank you
8:55pm

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